cancerschmancer - dont be a grace robber

so it's been 27 days since cancer entered our home. i was never one to count days after an event but now i see that when something so significant happens, it's hard to ignore it. 28 days ago we had no idea what we were about to experience, good and bad. joyful and tearful. through it all, God has been faithful over and over. our prayer is that we will have a lot more days ahead of us post cancer than we do pre cancer. but only He knows.

people praying is the best thing ever. we've been prayed over and loved in abundance and we are incredibly thankful.

another one of the ways that the Lord has ministered to us is through the body of Christ. since day 1, we have not gone a single day - not one - without some sort of surprise reminding us that we don't take this journey alone. often times these things arrive before we even know that we need them and then when the need arises, it has already been met. twice taylor and i prayed for something very specific and told no one. within days there it was. more tears of thankfulness.

some days its a text or email.
a card in the mail.
a blender.
dinner.
gift cards.
the lawn being mowed.
cupcakes.
a book.
a cancer organizer.
flowers.
a notecard with a verse for our hope pile.
a letter.
a worship cd.
coffee.
a journal.
a mint plant (which i killed - sorry!)
magazines for chemo.
protein powder.
ginger root for nausea.
a blanket for chemo.

the list goes on and on.

every single thing we have received has brought me to tears. i have yet to have one whole tear free day, i won't give up though!

it's hard for us to receive. one of the many many lessons we are learning in this is that it's ok to accept help and gifts because the giver is as blessed to give as we are in receiving.

one day in the beginning a friend tried to do something for us and i said no, it's ok. i can take care of it and she looked at me and in her best mom voice, she said, "don't be a grace robber." did i cry? yes. (no shocker there!) and she went on to do that thing she knew we needed. by doing it ourselves we are robbing them the opportunity to be His hand and feet and show us grace.

over and over the Lord has ministered to those words to my heart when my knee jerk reaction is to say no, we are ok - when in my heart it's a lie. i'm not ok. i can't do that. i can't make dinner or drive the kids or run to the store or ... but because we are trained to be independent and do it ourselves, we in effect become grace robbers.

i now look forward to each new day because i know blessings are waiting. and each time we are blessed by something - anything - we look at each other and say, God is good.