this morning i called the oncologist's office and was told we were good to go - his white blood cell count was high enough and they'd see us at 1:30 for chemo.
our sweet friend carol prayed for matt today, she prayed he'd have opportunities in the chemo room. she also gave him a new beautiful bible.
when he took his chair in the room, we were a little disappointed to only see one other person in there.
the nurses discussed whether or not to put in a one day iv or a three day iv. either one would be ok. but the more chemo he has, the harder it is to find a good vein so by day 3 of treatment, veins collapse, blow and just plan disappear. christy, our nurse today got him the first time and said she was very pleased with how well hydrated he was. she put in a three day but said she could take it out if it wasn't comfortable. it would just save him from getting stuck a few more times in the next 2 days. as it turned out, we weren't thinking and had her put it in his right hand so after the appointment at matt's request, she took it out so it wouldn't bother him as he works, writes, etc. tomorrow she'll put one in his left hand and will leave it there through wednesday's appointment.
the room started filling and there was only one chair left empty, right next to us.
our oncologist came to see us. she told us she spoke with the surgeon and got an update on our appointment last week. she'll be scheduling the scans to take place soon.
she spoke with the oncologist at city of hope as well. he was pleased matt had surgery, she sent him all of the reports. she said he's very interested and remembers matt clearly. he wants to keep track of the progress. he recommends 4 chemo treatments. we thought we were having 3. that was a huge disappointment to matt. i could see it in his eyes immediately. he wants to be done.
i think it's like running a marathon. at mile 24, you know you are 2.2 miles from the finish line. you dig, you know you are almost done and then told you are actually running 30 miles, not 26.2. it is a little defeating. but you press on.
as matt started getting juiced up with bag one of four, we opened up and began to read in the one year bible. and wouldn't you know it, in walked james. you may remember him from a post a few weeks ago. that post is here: chemo room and james. he sat down in the chair next to us and asked how we've been. he remembered matt from a month ago and it was like two long time friends catching up. i was awkwardly sitting between them. he noticed our bibles and told us again how he loves the Word. he asked where we were reading today. soon he was leaning as far over in his chair as possible so i began to read through numbers a bit louder. when matt started reading mark i noticed james' eyes were shut. i thought maybe he fell asleep. soon he took the tv monitor and put it next to his ear but i noticed he didn't turn it on. he looked at me, smiled and shut his eyes again. as it turns out, he was listening and focusing on matt's reading and the tv was being used to block out the neighboring lady's voice.
when we finished reading psalms and proverbs, james told us various things that he loves in the Bible. matt asked if he ever read revelation. oh yes, that's his favorite. john, ah john, that's one of james' favorite disciples. the man in schooled in the word. makes me wonder if he really does go to the LDS church up the street. the men continued talking throughout the appointment.
today we learned james lives in an assisted living home. they took all of his things when he moved in. his rodeo trophies and coin collections. but it's ok he said, i forgive them, those are just things. he mentioned his daughter. he told us again about his belt buckle. matt told him our kids loved the story of the dog biting off his finger, he laughed. we learned he won a brand new car in 1969 on The Price is Right, that's back when bob barker was the host he told us. he couldn't remember what kind. but it was nice and it was a ford. he didn't spin the wheel good enough to get to the end, but he had fun that day, but the wait was 6 or 7 hours, he'll never forget that part.
soon james was done. the nurse said she called his ride and they would be there soon. as they were taking out his iv, he told matt he'd pray for him tonight. matt was still hooked up and asked james if he could pray for him before he left. james said "yes. please. and matt, could you pray i don't get sick from chemo?" he got into his motorized chair and made his way to matt. matt prayed. the two men shook hands. and james was gone.
neither matt nor i could speak, i had a lump in my throat, he had tears in his eyes. james hand was so cold. it was so boney. he's old and incredibly frail. he was facing cancer alone. a medical transport service got him to and from appointments. he went back to his place. alone. the Word of God brings him comfort at night, i understand that.
for the rest of our appointment i thought about james and our cancer journey. i thought about how i am or was, so anxious to get back to my cancer free life and i was counting down the appointments but the reality is, the Lord is giving matt more opportunities to talk with, read to and pray with James and others like him in the chemo room.
i watch matt and i'm in awe of his boldness and genuine care for others.
how i long to be like that. i don't want to be in such a hurry that i miss out on the "james" opportunities of life because it's the eternal things that matter. no matter how many chemos we have left, my prayer is that He'd be glorified and we'd never pass an opportunity to share Him, to pray with others.
the verse that came to mind as i thought about this is 2 for 4:17, "for our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all."
as matt would say, cancer is worth it.
i'm not sure we'll see james again, he didn't look well. but i'm certain, after only two encounters with him, he'll be one i remember fondly when i reflect on our journey with cancer.
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