we are in the wait part of this cancer journey. this is hard. every stage is hard, not harder, just a different hard. we don't know what is happening inside matts head. the sitting and being idle, if you will, gives my head time to think.
is the cancer growing?
is it shrinking?
is the radiation working?
is the chemo still doing its job?
when will the next mri be done?
what will the surgeon decide?
when will surgery be done?
why does matt have a headache?
why is he tired?
in this time, the Lord, as he has been, is faithful to meet me right where i am.
one of my recent devotions came from matthew 6:33-34.
"but seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all of these things shall be added until you. therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own. sufficient for the day is its own trouble."
nowhere in the Word of God did He lay out His complete plans for anyone's life.
it would be too overwhelming if we knew the whole picture, saw the complete journey that was ahead. to know the future would be like a first year algebra student demanding to move on to calculus, it won't work, you have to take it one step at a time. He does, however, have a plan and tells us what we need for today.
in fact, He doesn't just have a plan, but He has a good plan. He has great things for us.
so we'll live in THIS day and trust Him with each moment. and grow an ever greater dependence on Him as we walk this cancer road. while i'm not thankful my beloved has cancer, i'm thankful that through the cancer He shows us how great He is.
and so we wait. and we watch. and we pray.
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